His Rival

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Format:

Publisher’s Synopsis:
I am a newly out football star and I got into a heated altercation with an opposition player in our last game. Things got very physical on the field and I will never forget that fight I got into with my rival.

When a new player joins my team, the last person I expects it to be is Ethan Robinson, my rival, who I fought with in the last game.

I am not happy about this and I make my displeasure with the newcomer very clear. I refuse to be amicable with this guy. I absolutely hate him.

So why do I find him so goddamn sexy?

And what will ever come of this if I take things further?

Point of view:
1st person. Alternating between Scott and Ethan’s perspectives.

Rellim’s Thoughts:
DNF at 47%

This is a debut from this author and I really wanted to like it, but just couldn’t. This story suffered from a lack of worldbuilding and authenticity. I didn’t feel connected to the story or the characters. While there aren’t any flagrant spelling/grammar/editing issues, it doesn’t feel like a completed book. What I wish it had:

* Distinct characters – everyone “sounds” exactly the same in speech, mannerisms, and personality. There’s no physical descriptions of characters beyond “nice ass”. Only a few last names. Minimally, I want to feel like I know the MCs beyond the basic “gay football player”.

* Sports – What’s the name of the team? Where is the team located? With the exception of the quarterback, I have no clue what position any of them play. Who is Larry? Manager? Owner? The description of on-the-field plays is basic to the point of barely being able to tell it’s football. Ultimately, the only reason the reader knows it’s the NFL is because of the mention of Super Bowl (which the author erroneously spells “Superbowl”).

* Maturity – the interactions/conversations are more on par with a YA romance. Not adult men in the NFL.

Things that just didn’t ring true/make sense:

* NFL players “pooling their money” to buy a van to share so that they could all go and party after the games. At a local diner. With one of them serving as a designated driver. (minimum salary in the NFL is over $600K. These guys are going to hire car services/uber/taxi/etc. – not buy a van together.)

* Players don’t just call up another team, “interview”, and start the following week. There are agents, managers, contracts, and approval by the NFL.

Content Warnings (spoilers):
There’s a scene where Ethan ambush-kisses Scott in the shower after a game, blows him, and walks off. It bordered on feeling like a sexual assault rather than a sexy interlude. Especially when Ethan blasts Scott’s attempts to talk with him after.

About the author:
You can connect with Holly Myers here:

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